Parents often ask such questions as “how to raise a child”, “what parents should teach a child”, “what children should know most” … young children say that they have summarized some of the main points of raising that parents at home and abroad have mentioned most for your reference.
Look at the following, did your children do it?
- Cultivate children’s habit of cherishing articles.
Children often waste water when washing their hands and bathing? The child turned on the TV, but the man disappeared? Children throw toys about and throw them about? Children’s puzzles are always incomplete? Children’s toys, cups and other items are always lost?
These behaviors of children, wasting money is a trivial matter. After accumulating over time, children may form the habit of wasting and not knowing how to cherish, and naturally they will not know how to cherish what they have when they grow up. This kind of habit is very bad.
A mother may say, “I want to raise a rich child and cannot make it look too shabby.” The answer given by the young child is: “well-fed” is not equivalent to “wasting things”. Parents can buy all kinds of things for their children regardless of money, but this seems to have no conflict with “cherishing things and keeping everything they have”. In addition, “well-fed children” is also a controversial topic.
No matter what, it is a correct parenting principle to train children to cherish things, and it is also a way to cultivate children’s “sense of responsibility”, killing two birds with one stone.
- Teach children to take care of themselves We often see countless 7-and 8-year-old children still look like “little babies”. They depend on their parents for everything, asking adults to help them dress, wear shoes, bathe and even let their mothers wipe them after going to the toilet. Parents love their children, that’s right, but it is irrational to “waste” their children. Below are the children’s “ability to reach the standard” required by their age. Did your kids do it?
At the age of 1, the baby is encouraged to carry cups and drink water by himself, and begin to practice simple things such as throwing the used diapers into the garbage can and taking off shoes independently.
At the age of 2, children can try to wear shoes, eat and wash their hands, instead of parents’ help subconsciously.
At the age of 3, children can learn to button and remove buttons, and take the initiative to pour water when thirsty. Of course, adults should ensure that the water with proper temperature is placed in the place where children can touch it, and that the material of the water cup and kettle is not easy to break.
At the age of 4, children can learn to brush their teeth by themselves and adults can help with brushing when necessary. Learn to clean yourself after going to the toilet.
At the age of 5, the child tried to learn how to solve more problems by himself, and only asked adults for help when encountering difficulties. For example, you have to dry yourself when you pour the cup.
3, let children learn to wait In many families, children “must” and “need” whatever they want, and they will be happy when they get it quickly, otherwise they will cry or lose their temper. After children develop this habit, they will not only lack patience with things in the future, but also have no awareness of “waiting” and do not know how to delay consumption. When you grow up, you may be impatient, impatient, easy to spend money recklessly, self-indulgent, and lack of planning for your life.
On the contrary, a child who knows how to “wait” has learned patience since childhood. A little patience is not only helpful for children’s future interpersonal communication; Children who know how to wait also tend to respect others. More importantly, patience is also conducive to learning. Why? Because learning often requires children to persevere, few studies can produce immediate results. It can be said that learning to wait is an ability.
Another study found that although children before the age of four are young, 4-6 years old is a key age for training children to learn to “wait” and helps to cultivate their patient character. How to do it?
For example, parents can agree with their children on how long to buy toys before buying them to help them learn to postpone consumption. Sometimes when the child needs help, if the matter is not urgent, parents can ask the child to “wait a moment”; Parents can also accompany their children to plant a small tree and experience the process of growing the small tree into a big tree together with their children.
4, set the control “angry worm” agreement Many emotion management experts said, “the ability to control emotions is not innate, but comes from learning.” All children have angry experiences. As parents, we should help children learn to “channel” anger correctly, instead of letting off steam casually, causing negative emotions to hurt themselves and interpersonal relationships. What exactly should we do?
For example, we often see 1-and 2-year-old babies like to hit people or do damage when they are angry. “When angry, you can tell your mother or hold her, but you can’t catch her face or throw toys …” Setting the “can” and “can’t” behaviors when angry helps the baby learn proper behaviors slowly.
For 3-and 4-year-old children, we should listen to them and avoid excessive blame. “Mom understands that your’ angry worm’ has run out, but if you don’t make noise or fight, mom will be able to help you.”
For children of 5 or 6 years old, parents should focus on guiding the children to express their inner feelings. “Parents also have angry experiences. Tell your feelings to parents, and you will feel better”; If your children are always angry, you can start with these simple suggestions. If you want to get systematic methods, you can read my books. Dealing with anger is the basis of children’s emotional management and helps to cultivate children with high emotional intelligence.
- Children should learn to respect others Generally speaking, children before the age of 6 often do not know that their behavior may disturb others, for example, they chase in the library, but do not know that frolic will affect others’ reading. For example, they eat in restaurants and don’t know that too much excitement will disturb the people around them … that’s because their empathy is not yet mature at this age.
However, as parents, we should teach our children to try to understand others’ feelings and learn to respect others when they disturb others. For example, we can guide children to look at picture books or story films related to empathy, listen to the voices of others more, encourage children to think from the perspective of others, “if you were her, what would you do?” and “if you were reading story books and someone sang nearby, would you feel disturbed” etc.
Why do we want children to respect others? Children learn to respect and self-discipline, which is the basic quality for them to have good interpersonal relationships in the future.
Quick check, have your children learned?